Have you noticed????

When your life is going great and when everything seems fine, but somehow deep down inside nothing feels right....

confused????

I know I am....

well, I'm back....finished my guiding exams and now bracing myself for the results....i so want this to be over asap....

on the other hand, i'm sad my BA classes are ending....haiz... as the saying goes all good things must come to an end....

i'm gonna miss all of them....especially my group members.....i remember doing all our class presentation last min and yet we get pretty good grades for them....hahahahaha.....

on the bright side, we can meet up w/o the fear of the impending deadlines looming over our heads....

ok back to mindless blogging, i wanna start my blog with a few lines someone sent me....

raah esi ho k vo chalne pe majbur ho jaye,

let the path compel him/her to walk on it

chahat esi ho k vo sochne majbur ho jaye,

let the path compel him/her to think about it

bhale na mile hame vo lekin intezar esa ho k vo aane pe majbur hojaye.....

it's ok if i don't get him/her, let the wait compel him/her to come back to me.....

not in the mood to write today

Have you noticed????

When your life is going great and when everything seems fine, but somehow deep down inside nothing feels right....

confused????

I know I am....

well, im back....finished my guiding exams and now bracing myself for the results....i so want this to be over asap....

on the other hand, i'm sad my BA classes are ending....haiz... as the saying goes all good things must come to an end....

i'm gonna miss all of them....especially my group members.....i remember doing all our class presentaion last min and yet we get pretty good grades for them....hahahahaha.....

on the bright side, we can meet up w/o the fear of the impending deadlines looming over our heads....

ok back to mindless blogging, i wanna start my blog with a few lines someone sent me....

raah esi ho k vo chalne pe majbur ho jaye,

let the path compel him/her to walk on it

chahat esi ho k vo sochne majbur ho jaye,

let the path compel him/her to think about it

bhale na mile hame vo lekin intezar esa ho k vo aane pe majbur hojaye.....

it's ok if i dont get him/her, let the wait compel him/her to come back to me.....

not in the mood to write today

Hey,

the weather is so bloody shitty.....I am at work and all I wanna do is sleep...it would have been great if I were to be at home and my bed with my bolster and Paolo....haiz....anywayz I have my final assessment due next week and I have not prepared anything for it.....I m so gonna go down.... well I’ve been reciting a story in my head and I know that if I don’t jot it down, my head will explode so here goes the story for today......

Do not read my story and associate me with it.... *I’ll sock you*

If it’s about me, it will be stated so there..... *kapish????*

She looked at the phone....she willed it to ring....weird thoughts are running through her mind...what in the world is he up to???? Why has he not called me??? It’s been 3 days since we talked....what the hell is he trying to prove???? She reflects back to their last meeting....he claimed he had fun and all then why is he not calling???? She screams silently.....she picks up the phone wanting to call him but hesitates....why should she call??? Who is he to her anywayz???? Just a friend....so whether he calls or not shouldn't make any difference....she comforted herself with these thoughts....however, her brains were motioning her to go otherwise*funny how that works; why can't the mind and heart work together and come to a mutual understanding???*

she messages him.....wanting to give him a piece of her mind but holds her fingers back and sent him a polite message....he responded....somehow he seem nonchalant....that irked her some more...unfazed, she replied to his messages.....half of her wanted to pluck his hair, follicle by follicle, the other half of her was just glad that he responded....

As she lay on her bed and stared at the ceiling, she though she heard someone call out to her....it was her conscience...questions were being asked and answers were being given....

How can she be with someone when she is with someone else and he is with someone else????

At that moment in time, it's just the 2 of us....

How can she be the other woman when she told herself that she will never be the other woman???

As long as there is no talk about marriage, I’m not the other woman.......

Is she doing the wrong thing????

How can something so wrong feel so right????

Now that she is officially with no one but he is someone, does that make it all right???

Planning didn't get me anywhere and going with the flow seems to be working just fine.......

Being an emotional person, could she untangle her way out of the tangled mess???

Matters of the heart and mind are 2 different issues; me being with him makes me feel better mentally....

If she merely likes him, then why does she look forward to his sms and calls????

Finally an intellectual who will listen to me..........

Conscience walked away dejectedly...

Feeling confident and knowing that her life is in control, she moves on to conquer the world..... she knows she would not break down no matter how bad the circumstances may be....she believes that she is finally stronger and confident.... she thanks her ex for these new-found confidence and strength...if he wasn’t the whiny baby that he was, she would have never found her hidden quality or talent which is to be able to think out of the box and face any problems head on...she is moving along in life, leaving the tortoise version of her behind....no more cowering in the shell...living life precariously and loving every minute of it....

As for the both of them, they were together till he got married....on the eve of his wedding day, they bid each other adieu and went their separate ways......

watched RUN FATBOY RUN yesterday....kinda nice movie...liked the dry humor...kinda inspiring in a weird way...hahahahahaha
David Schwimmer did a great job directing his debut movie. The humor was intellectual and the bottom line of this movie is to never give up no matter how shitty life can be....I enjoyed the part when the kid claims that he has a girl friend and runs away from home when she likes another kid because he has a pony tail.... *young innocent love* Somehow, the talk actually inspired him to run the marathon even though he had lost the woman that he loves to someone else....
Dennis attempts to be like Whit, who eventually turned out to be a twit.....
Dennis being Dennis is lovable in a sloppy kinda way....
I especially like Dylan Moran's character...his couldn't care less attitude and because of his bet, he tries unconventional methods to train Dennis...Mr G's spatula helps him to continue and eventually finish the race....
I would recommend all to watch this movie....ain't that spectacular but nice....

Semi - Pro however was a mindless movie....nothing much can be said much about it movie.... except that to leave your brains at home when you watch this movie...the humor's dead...will Ferrell's voice became irritating after some time...i guess he can be a part of the movie and not be the whole movie....*makes sense?* his presence was over powering and at some stage i felt a strong urge to hurl my popcorn at the screen....
if you want my advise on this movie, pls do not waste your money to watch it...don't even buy the movie.... rent it.....

in other happenings for today, came to work and found a trail of blood all the way to the car park... colleagues and have been speculating of some fight that might have happened last night....

finally PARKLANE SHOPPING MALL has got some action.....hahahahahahaha

hey hey,

have not written a story for a long time.....

was drafting this last night.....

before i start, i gotta make myself clear,

THIS STORY IS NOT ABOUT ME; THIS IS RANDOM STORY......

Dear God,

I don't know why he called me tonight....We went out but I felt as though he was compelled... It was as though I was a thing and he was just doing his "duty"....Why did I go in the 1st place??? Why did I have to drop everything run to him??? Why must he be my 1st priority when I was neva his??? Why must I love him so much that it hurts every inch of my soul??? Why can't he understand??? I am not a thing...I happen to be a human being...I deserve to be loved....I was with him when he was down and now that he is back on the track it's time for my exit...I thought he loved me...I thought we could be together finally but I was so wrong...I just want to move away from him and everyone else... I don't wanna see, hear or talk about him or anyone else...Please give me the strength to move on in my life...I want to be happy...truly happy...I don't wanna put on my fake smile and tell the world that everything is dandy...Can I be selfish for once??? Can I put myself 1st??? Somehow I just wanna liberate myself from it all...I feel so lost in this big world....No one to call my own...I don't wanna live my life anymore....It's just so tiring....so painful to get out of bed every morning....every single day seems to be torturous....All I ever wanted was someone to call my own, a little happiness...was that too much????

I am tired of everything blowing up in my face....nothing seems to go right....I' m so tired of picking up the pieces and putting them back together....only to find the next person that comes along smashing it into pieces....

Oh God.... If you are listening, take me.....TAKE ME NOW...............

Saturday night was spent at the beach...wasn't feeling clubby, neither was feeling homely so called a friend and headed out the beach in Sentosa...it was fun...it was quiet...actually not so quiet coz some Indian monkey were creating a ruckus and swimming in the water in the middle of the night or should i say wee hours in the morning...it was a good and refreshing experience...got pretty spooked at first with things in the water...weird people choose weird time to swim...KM8 was closed and we realized that both of us did not buy any drink...luckily there were chairs and so we sat and talked...actually i talked and he listened ...god knows what was running in his mind...we then started talking about astronomy...it was kinda amusing because we both are clueless at what we were looking...there were little clouds...i don't know if anyone has actually done cloud - watching... i know i used to put chairs and a little table with a mug of milo outside my house just to watch the clouds go by... it's pretty fun u know...imagining the different shapes to be different stuff...apparently he has never done that and he found it weird...in short he found me weird and i smacked his arm...guess he was unaware of my fast reflexes...*HAIIIIIII - YAAAAAAAAAA*

anywayz, i don't think i have ever seen so many stars before in Singapore...i guess the light pollution in S'pore too damn high... but the stars were simply beautiful...i remember my mom telling me when i was little that when someone dies they go up and become a star to watch over you...i believe that my brother is there watching over me... was lying down on the the huge lounge chairs and we were looking up at the stars...

well, the some typical Indians started swimming in the sea, killing the silence.... we were contemplating the fact should 1 of them scream "someone's grabbing my leg.... HELP ME!!!!!" what would happen....i guess they would run for their lives leaving that person to die.... we also thought of talking really loud in tamil.....being the busy - bodies that they are they would be tempted to walk over... we left eventually at about five-ish and before we left, i distinctly remember him telling me, " I was physically exhausted when I came to meet you, now that we are leaving, I am both physically and mentally exhausted..." i could not stop laughing... it was super funny lah... his facial expression and all...

that night was funny; tiring; relaxing and stress free.....

i had a great time and the spontaneity was superb......

somehow, somewhere, someone is born for me.....

sounds familiar???????? how many times has this phrase gone through our minds....everyone of us are princesses and we should not tolerate any form of cruelty......just the other day, i was talking to someone about "special someone"..... it made me think.... is there really someone out there made for us????? or is it just a myth????? could it be just tale our parents made up for us???

sometimes i wonder about the irony of life...why does the heart yearns for one that you know it's wrong???? the logic of the heart always seems illogical...contradicting don't you think??? how come we miss the miss that we don't love more than the person we love??? it's so confusing....

its depressing when you are the receiving end of the brunt....r'ships of any kind are all about compromises....giving and taking....there is no such thing whereby every man is perfect...somehow in love all imperfections are overlooked....

i dream....

a dream whereby i would find myself the right partner one day.....

a dream where i can stand proud ann tell the world i have found my special one....

a dream where i can tell everyone that i m truly happy and complete in life?????

random-ness back again.....

cheers.....